How To DM Someone in Discord

Discord is a messaging application popular among gamers. Using servers and group chats, friends can communicate quickly with each other through group chats or direct messages. Whether you’d like to chat with several users all at one time or take your conversations private with only one other friend it is possible using the Discord app.

Direct messaging allows you to hold a conversation with someone who is not a member of the same servers that you’re in. For moments when a private conversation is necessary or preferred, Discord offers both Direct Messages (DM) and Group Chat.

What is a Discord DM and how do I set it up on my Discord Server?

Discord’s direct messages allow you to have one-on-one communication with another user in the Discord community. These are private conversations that you can initiate from within the application.

As a subset of Discord’s Friends List, you can send direct messages and start group chats regardless of the server in which you’re all currently engaged. I’ve created a comprehensive walk-through providing exactly what you’ll need to get your Discord messaging game on point.

Sending A Direct Message in Discord

Below you find detailed instructions that will guide you through initiating a direct message on Discord. Whether you’re using a PC or Mac, Android, or an iOS device (iPhones and iPad), you will find the instructions below.

Direct Messages Via PC and Mac

The process of sending DM”s on a PC and a Mac are pretty much the same so, if you have a PC or a Mac, follow these instructions:

  1. Log in to Discord. It’s important to mention some users may have their DM settings set to “Friends Only,” meaning you won’t be able to message them unless they’re on your friends’ list.
  2. To DM a friend, click the Discord icon at the top right of the screen and choose Friends from the menu list.
  3. Swap to the “All” tab if you want to see all friends available on your list or keep it on the “Online” tab if hoping to message a friend currently online.
  4. Scroll through your friends until you find the one you want to DM and then click on the user you’d like to chat with. This will open up a Direct Message between you. You can now enter your message in the text box at the bottom of the window, pressing the ENTER key to send the message.
  5. To DM a member of a server you are a member of, log in to the Discord server by clicking on it from the server menu on the far left side.
  6. While on the server, scroll through the list of member names from the menu to the far right until you find who you’re looking for.
  7. Right-click the member’s name and from the dialog menu, choose Message.
  8. The Direct Message window will be pulled up and you can enter your message into the text box at the bottom. Press the ENTER key to send the message.

Now you know how to DM on a PC or a Mac, but what about for mobile? Next, I’ll show you how to send Direct Messages for Android devices and for your iOS devices (iPhone and iPad).

Direct Messages Via Android Devices

  1. Log in to Discord on your Android device.
  2. Tap over to the “ALL” tab which is located in the top-left corner of the screen.
  3. Choose the contact from the list of friends to open their profile.
  4. Tap the Chat Message button (white chat bubble over blueish background) to open a DM window with the selected individual.
  5. Bring up your keyboard by tapping the message box toward the bottom of the screen and enter in the message you want to send.
  6. Tap Send to see your message delivered. It will now be visible in the DM window to both you and the recipient.

Direct Messages via iOS devices (iPhone or iPad)

  1. Log in to Discord on your iPhone or iPad
  2. Tap the Friends logo at the top-left corner of the screen. You may need to tap the triple white lines to get to that window, also located at the top-left.
  3. If you know the friend’s username, you can begin typing it into the text box. The box will likely have Find or Start a Conversation already in it. Or you can always scroll through your list of friends until you get to the one you want to DM.
  4. When you find the recipient, tap on their nametag to pull up a conversation window.
  5. Type your message into the chat box at the bottom of the screen.
  6. When ready, tap Send and your message will be visible in the conversation window to both you and the recipient.

Creating A Discord Group Chat

When it comes to creating a group chat, you’re only allowed to invite those who happen to be on your Friends List. Anyone you’d like to add to the conversation will need to be on your Friends List or you’ll need to add them to it.

Once all those you want to add to the Group Chat have been made friends, a new button labeled New Group DM will be available to you.

If you click on the new button at the top-right of the window, another window will come up with all of your friends (only those on the list).

You can choose to either scroll through the list to locate the friends you want to add to a group chat or type their name into the search box. You can add up to 9 friends to a Group Chat, which, counting you makes a total of 10 Discord users.

Another way to open up a Group Chat is by adding additional friends to a conversation already in progress. Open up a DM in progress between yourself and a friend and at the top-right of the window, click the Add Friends To DM button.

This keeps the DM available between you and the original recipient separate but opens up a new conversation between the two of you and additional friends.

Kicking Members out of a Group Chat

Any member in the Group Chat can add additional members (up to the maximum). However, only the individual who started the Group Chat can actually kick anyone out of it. To remove a member from the Group Chat:

  1. To the right side of the window, locate the list of Group Chat members.
  2. Find the member you want to be kicked out and right-click on the name.
  3. From the options provided, choose Remove From Group.


Group Chat Additions

Right-clicking on the Group Chat title will open up a list of options pertaining to the Group Chat. You can provide Instant Invites, Mute Players, Leave Group, or Change or Remove the GC icon.

You also have the option of changing the GC name by clicking on it at the top of the window. A Group Chat is not unlike a server text channel when it comes to what you can do. Add notes, use @mentions, and check out other user’s profiles easily.

How to DM Someone Who Isn’t a Friend

Assuming you’re in a server with someone who isn’t your friend and you’d like to send them a direct message, it is possible if you follow these steps:

  1. From inside the server tap on the icon that looks like two people together. Scroll down and tap on the user that you’d like to chat with.
  2. Tap on the option to ‘Message.’
  3. Next, you can type and send your message like you usually would.

As mentioned previously, if you do not have this option it’s likely due to the user’s privacy settings. In that case, you can send them a friend request to begin messaging.

One thought on “How To DM Someone in Discord”

Avatar M.E.Young says:
So..either it’s my app, or my phone (Moto e5 Cruz) but when I hit the chat button, it sends me back to my friend list. Then I’d tap on the friend I wanna message and end up on his profile… I’d tap the chat button again, and end up back on my friend list screen.. and I’d repeat the process, to no avail..

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