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189 Cool and Funny Instagram Bios

Posted by Robert Hayes on July 20, 2019

People who seriously engage on Instagram know that your bio is one of the most important ways you have to differentiate yourself and send a signal to your followers about what kind of person (or company) you are. Your bio is one of the first things people see about you, and is just as important as the photos you post on your account. It’s your one and only shot at making a first impression, and is often the reason that people decide to give following you a chance. If you dash off a thoughtless bio, you may be losing out on potential followers who would raise your online social status, and gain you connections in the real and virtual world. An account with a bad bio will be forced to settle for less followers than it truly deserves.

An Instagram bio is limited to 150 characters – that’s not a lot. It’s about thirty words, which is from one to three short sentences, or one long one. Most people throw a few adjectives into the space to fill it and move on, or put way too much information into these bios. You want to strike a balance—something personal but not over-the-top, something funny but uncommon and creative, and something people haven’t seen on the platform. You also need to think about the reason for your Instagram account, and make your bio appropriate. If you’re advertising your moodily-lit photography services, you don’t want a sarcastic wisecracking bio, and conversely if you’re presenting yourself as a party-hearty influencer on the make, you want to avoid the deep thoughts quotes. What constitutes a good bio really depends on what YOU are trying to accomplish.

In this article, I’m going to give you some tips on developing your own approach to your bio. I’ll also present a bunch of great bio samples, ranging from silly to funny to philosophical, that you can use as a starting point for your own unique Instagram bio.

Tips for Making an Instagram Bio

The following tips will help you design a bio that will attract the right followers for your account.

  • Match your bio to your account style. In other words, if your account is a dizzying display of puppies in costumes, silly poses, or even outer space, you’ll want your bio to be something silly and whimsical. Basically, you want to attract the sort of people who are going to be into the sort of thing that you’re going to publish to your Instagram account.
  • Match your bio to your target audience. This goes hand in hand with the last tip. Too often people just aim to get as many followers as possible. In reality, you want the types of followers who are going to enjoy your content. That way, they’ll like and comment on your photos. Speak to those people with your bio.
  • Keep it brief. Obviously, you want to get your point across. However, too much text will bore people and turn them away before they even finish reading. You can’t be too wordy with just 150 characters, but some people manage to be boring pretty quickly. Try not to be one of those people.
  • Keep it relatable. People are going to follow other people that they like. Give them a reason to like you.
  • Give them a reason to follow you. Your bio should be a promise to readers. If you’re going to be providing goofy content, make it something goofy. Political content, keep it political. Standard day-to-day photo-blogging of your life? Throw in something unique about why your content should keep the reader around.

These are some pretty standard rules to follow, but if you’re having trouble coming up with your own, we’ve got some great examples for you below.

InstagramBioSamples

Sample and Custom Instagram Bios

Still not convinced that you can write your own bio? No problem. These funny and cool Instagram bios appeal to large audiences and broadly applicable for different types of individual feeds, so go ahead and grab one, customize it to fit your needs, and throw it right in your bio! We’ve broken these out into some general categories.

Sarcastic Bios

  1. Fabulous ends in “us.” Coincidence? I think not.
  2. I’m only pretending to be me.
  3. Just a cupcake looking for a stud muffin.
  4. Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.
  5. You couldn’t handle me even if I came with instructions.
  6. Born to express, not to impress.
  7. Some people are alive only because it’s illegal to kill them.
  8. Whenever I have a problem, I sing. Then I realize my voice is worse than my problem.
  9. Who else are you going to follow? Really?
  10. Spent a large portion of my life eating. Will do the same in the next life.
  11. There. I joined Instagram. Happy now?
  12. I’m just having an allergic reaction to the universe.
  13. I’m not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them.
  14. I’m not a complete idiot; some parts are missing.
  15. Living vicariously through myself.
  16. Guest-starred in Frasier S6E8: “The Seal Who Came to Dinner.” You’re welcome.
  17. Light travels faster than sound. That’s why people appear bright until they speak.
  18. Time is precious. Waste it wisely.
  19. Hey, are you reading my bio again?
  20. I always learn from the mistakes of others who took my advice.
  21. Wait, where am I? How did I get in here?
  22. I will go into survival mode if tickled.
  23. My social security number is hidden in every single image I’ve ever posted.
  24. Recommended by 4 out of 5 people who recommend things.
  25. There are three kinds of people in this world, and I don’t like any of them.
  26. *Insert your judgments here.*
  27. I’ve dedicated this page to documenting the Coach reboot that never happened.
  28. I work an unpaid internship as a professional nerd.
  29. I still don’t understand Twitter, but here I am.
  30. This is mostly a Waluigi fan page—please adjust your expectations accordingly.
  31. It’s possible that I’m eating frosting with a spoon.
  32. Probably the most talented TV binge watcher you’ll find.
  33. My hobbies are breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
  34. I’m cool, but global warming made me HOT.
  35. I hold the key to the secrets of the universe. I just can’t find the lock.
  36. You have to sift through a lot of gold to find my dirt.
  37. Welcome to my Instagram feed, where people come to enjoy me.
  38. Gifted napper, talker, and ice cream eater.
  39. I know I left my sanity around here somewhere.
  40. Due to an intense mind fog, all of my thoughts have been grounded until further notice.
  41. I don’t make mistakes; I date them.
  42. I am best served with coffee and a side of sarcasm.
  43. I put the whine in wine.
  44. None of my friends know who Goku is.
  45. Not the guy she told you not to worry about.
  46. I work for money. If you want loyalty, get a dog.
  47. In desperate need of a six month vacation…twice a year.
  48. I thought I wanted a job, turns out I just wanted a paycheck.
  49. In case you haven’t noticed, I’m weird. I’m a weirdo.
  50. I tried some strawberry shampoo. It doesn’t taste as good as it smells.

Thought-Provoking Bios

  1. Sometimes we choose the road we follow. And sometimes the road chooses us.
  2. As long as there’s life, there’s hope.
  3. Knowledge is what enables one to be wrong.
  4. Do something to take your mind off thinking about what might never happen.
  5. We are a way for the cosmos to know itself.
  6. The temptation of this age is to look good without being good.
  7. Even the finest sword plunged into salt water will eventually rust.
  8. Every villain is a hero in his own mind.
  9. Your mind can be either your prison or your palace. What you make it is yours to decide.
  10. Even when we do not actively participate in our destiny, we are still on a chosen path. Life has a way of making decisions for us.
  11. What greater might do we possess as human beings than our capacity to question and to learn?
  12. We do not remember days, we remember moments.
  13. Let your action manifest your thought, your belief and your passion.
  14. We choose our next world through what we learn in this one.
  15. I have no fear, I have only love.
  16. It doesn’t matter if this is a dream or not. Survival depends on what you do, not what you think.
  17. Consciousness is only possible through change; change is only possible through movement.
  18. You can neither remember nor forget what you do not understand.
  19. Time is the single most important resource that we have. Every single minute we lose is never coming back.

Inspirational Bios

  1. Talent hits a target no one else can hit. Genius hits a target no one else can see.
  2. First they ignore you. Then they ridicule you. And then they attack you and want to burn you. And then they build monuments to you.
  3. Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed, citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.
  4. We accept the love we think we deserve.
  5. Fairy tales are more than true: not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten.
  6. There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.
  7. What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
  8. Everything you can imagine is real.
  9. Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
  10. Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.
  11. Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.
  12. Turn your wounds into wisdom.
  13. We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
  14. Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.
  15. Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.
  16. Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
  17. Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift of God, which is why we call it the present.
  18. What you’re supposed to do when you don’t like a thing is change it. If you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.
  19. It is never too late to be what you might have been.
  20. Whatever you are, be a good one.

Success Bios

  1. People of accomplishment rarely sit back and let things happen to them. They go out and happen to things.
  2. To be independent of public opinion is the first formal condition of achieving anything great.
  3. The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing.
  4. Success is most often achieved by those who don’t know that failure is inevitable.
  5. Don’t aim at success. The more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it.
  6. Fortune sides with him who dares.
  7. Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.
  8. Success is getting what you want, happiness is wanting what you get.
  9. Cry. Forgive. Learn. Move on. Let your tears water the seeds of your future happiness.
  10. Try not to become a man of success. Rather, become a man of value.
  11. Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.
  12. Let the improvement of yourself keep you so busy that you have no time to criticize others.
  13. I can’t give you a sure-fire formula for success, but I can give you a formula for failure: try to please everybody all the time.
  14. Success is not how high you have climbed, but how you make a positive difference to the world.
  15. He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, and loved much.
  16. Kites rise highest against the wind, not with it.
  17. Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.
  18. Accepting oneself does not preclude an attempt to become better.
  19. The only time you fail is when you fall down and stay down.
  20. Have no fear of perfection – you’ll never reach it.

Leadership Bios

  1. If you’re not confused, you’re not paying attention.
  2. Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.
  3. Be with a leader when he is right, stay with him when he is still right, but, leave him when he is wrong.
  4. Leadership is not about titles, positions or flowcharts. It is about one life influencing another.
  5. Leaders live by choice, not by accident.
  6. In the end, it is important to remember that we cannot become what we need to be, by remaining what we are.
  7. Don’t tell people how to do things, tell them what to do and let them surprise you with their results.
  8. If you really want the key to success, start by doing the opposite of what everyone else is doing.
  9. A leader is a dealer in hope.
  10. Keep your fears to yourself, but share your courage with others.
  11. You do not lead by hitting people over the head — that’s assault, not leadership.
  12. In the future, there will be no female leaders. There will just be leaders.
  13. You get in life what you have the courage to ask for.
  14. Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.
  15. The task of the leader is to get his people from where they are to where they have not been.
  16. I cannot trust a man to control others who cannot control himself.
  17. He who cannot be a good follower cannot be a good leader.
  18. The key to successful leadership is influence, not authority.
  19. Unless today is well lived, tomorrow is not important.
  20. It’s only after you’ve stepped outside your comfort zone that you begin to change, grow, and transform.
  21. Leadership is the challenge to be something more than average.
  22. If you want to rebel, rebel from inside the system.That’s much more powerful than rebelling outside the system.
  23. Surround yourself with great people; delegate authority; get out of the way.
  24. Any man who retreats into a cave which has only one opening deserves to die.
  25. He who wishes to be obeyed must know how to command.
  26. My words itch at your ears till you understand them.
  27. Rank does not confer privilege or give power. It imposes responsibility. 31
  28. We’re here for a reason. I believe a bit of the reason is to throw little torches out to lead people through the dark.
  29. Not all readers are leaders, but all leaders are readers.
  30. Don’t follow the crowd, let the crowd follow you.
  31. The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires.
  32. Whenever you see a successful business, someone once made a courageous decision.
  33. Lead me, follow me, or get the hell out of my way.
  34. And if the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch.
  35. It’s hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse.
  36. Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things.
  37. Success is not how high you have climbed, but how you make a positive difference to the world.
  38. Being responsible sometimes means pissing people off.
  39. Victory has a hundred fathers and defeat is an orphan.
  40. If you’re going through hell, keep going.

Spirituality Bios

  1. How hurtful it can be to deny one’s true self and live a life of lies just to appease others.
  2. Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace. Where there is hatred, let me sow love.
  3. One needs no strange spiritual faith to worship the earth.
  4. The possession of knowledge does not kill the sense of wonder and mystery. There is always more mystery.
  5. Your emotions are the slaves to your thoughts, and you are the slave to your emotions.
  6. One thing: you have to walk, and create the way by your walking; you will not find a ready-made path.
  7. Forgive the past. It is over. Learn from it and let go.
  8. What has he found who has lost God? And what has he lost who has found God?
  9. The only time you fail is when you fall down and stay down.
  10. A sacrifice to be real must cost, must hurt, and must empty ourselves.
  11. Re-examine all you have been told. Dismiss what insults your soul.
  12. Your sacred space is where you can find yourself over and over again.
  13. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.
  14. We are all connected; To each other, biologically. To the earth, chemically. To the rest of the universe atomically.
  15. Realize deeply that the present moment is all you have. Make the NOW the primary focus of your life.
  16. Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.
  17. Until you value yourself, you won’t value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it.
  18. You can safely assume you’ve created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do.
  19. I’m not afraid of death because I don’t believe in it. It’s just getting out of one car, and into another.
  20. There are times when solitude is better than society, and silence is wiser than speech.
  21. You have to grow from the inside out. None can teach you, none can make you spiritual.
  22. A quiet conscience makes one strong!
  23. Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment.
  24. Anger, resentment and jealousy doesn’t change the heart of others– it only changes yours.
  25. Knowing is not enough, we must apply. Willing is not enough, we must do.
  26. What you are is God’s gift to you, what you become is your gift to God.
  27. Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.
  28. There is a reason they call God a presence – because God is right here, right now.
  29. The greatest disease in the West today is not TB or leprosy; it is being unwanted, unloved, and uncared for.
  30. Love is what we are born with. Fear is what we learn.
  31. The moment God is figured out with nice neat lines and definitions, we are no longer dealing with God.
  32. To conquer frustration, one must remain intensely focused on the outcome, not the obstacles.
  33. Being spiritual has nothing to do with what you believe and everything to do with your state of consciousness.
  34. Believe in your infinite potential. Your only limitations are those you set upon yourself.
  35. We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.
  36. Sometimes our light goes out, but is blown again into instant flame by an encounter with another human being.
  37. I know you’re tired but come, this is the way.
  38. A single day is enough to make us a little larger or, another time, a little smaller.
  39. We have a choice. We have two options as human beings. We have a choice between conversation and war.
  40. Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality.

With the art of the bio mastered in your case, there’s only one thing left to do. Through practice and effort, making your photos just as interesting as your Instagram bio will come naturally and quickly if you put the time in. Just stick to taking photos and videos and eventually you’ll be the best around. And now that you have your bio squared away, it’s time to find captions for all your amazing snaps and stories! Here’s some captions for the zoo, some captions for Las Vegas, some captions for Disney World, some funny Instagram captions, and some captions for couples.

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