Hinge is one of the many dating apps out there trying to offer something different for those tired of the same old Tinder treadmill. It works in much the same way but offers a couple of neat features that can help you engage with someone you like. Chatting and reaching out is still the same but has a little more potential. This page is going to show you how to send a message on Hinge, both the mechanics of it and a few ideas on what to say.
Hinge works a lot like Tinder in that you create a profile card for others to like or not. Where it differs is in the more social media aspect of it. Rather than looking and then swiping left or right, you can like or comment on any aspect of their profile. So if you like something in one of their pics, you can comment on it. Have a hobby in common? You can comment on that too.
This system gives a lot more scope for engaging with people rather than just that opening line. This is to the good. If you have ever used Tinder, you will likely have lost any sense of excitement when you see someone has reached out to you after the hundreds of ‘Hey’ comments or worse. Hinge tries to be different.
Sending messages on Hinge
While different in some aspects, Hinge is also the same in others. For chatting, this sameness is a good thing. Someone cannot begin an actual chat without you liking them back. They can comment on your profile whenever they like but cannot chat until you like them.
To be able to chat on Hinge, you can like a profile by selecting the heart icon. If they like you back, the Connect option appears. Select this to open a chat.
Alternatively, you can comment on any aspect of a profile, the images, description or whatever. The other person then has the option to engage with that comment and begin chatting from there.
Once a conversation begins, you take turns as usual. If it’s a chat between people who have liked each other, you may get a system prompt telling you it is ‘Your Turn’ to reply. Hinge wants you to continue the conversation and move on to better things.
Messaging on Hinge
Like any dating app, what you say as an opener has a huge influence over whether you get a reply or not. You need to remember why you’re on Hinge and have the bigger picture in mind. What do you imagine that person would appreciate in a comment? How would they take ‘X’ comment or ‘Y’ comment. Spending even 1 minute thinking about how your message or comment would go down with that person will set you head and shoulders above the majority of dating app users.
Pacing is important when messaging on dating apps. You don’t want to charge in with both barrels and ask them out on a date before knowing anything about them. Neither do you want to leave it so long that they think it will never happen and move on. It is also almost impossible to judge the right time.
There are signs that someone is interested in you though. You could use these as a good barometer of their feelings. If they are putting genuine thought into replies they are interested. If all you’re getting is ‘haha lol’ all the time, you’re on a loser. If you’re getting the same detail in replies as you’re sending, you’re doing better.
Emojis are usually a good sign too. While we do overuse them somewhat, they are an excellent way to express emotion without being direct.
Finally, if they are also asking questions of you as well as answering yours, that is also a good sign. Only people genuinely interested in someone who spend time and energy learning about them.
If you see any of these in your chats with someone on Hinge, you’re on the right track. Once you have chatted for a little while and there is a free flow of conversation and have learned a little about each other, then would be a good time to ask them out.
An excellent soft date would be to meet for a coffee rather than dinner. It’s less formal, easier to handle and is less loaded than a full dinner date. You could even say ‘meet up’ instead of date to remove some of that expectation and weight the word ‘date’ brings with it. All will help towards them saying yes.
There is no magic formula to Hinge or any dating app. Just be yourself, consider the bigger picture and the person behind the profile, be honest and be respectful and you should do fine!