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How To Send a Message on Tinder

Posted by Jamie on April 19, 2019

As we near the end of the 2010s, it’s clear that no technology has held a greater influence over our lives than the smartphone. First reaching peak success with Apple’s iPhone and followed closely with Google’s own Android OS (driven primarily by the sales of the Motorola Droid and, more recently, Samsung’s Galaxy S-line), smartphones have replaced so many gadgets, institutions, and social constructs that it’s often difficult to keep track. Your smartphone has taken the place of your iPod, your GPS, and your camera. You don’t carry around a flashlight, a calculator, or an e-Reader anymore. You purchase things from your hand instead of the store, buying groceries, airline tickets, and takeout all from the same device in seconds. You might not even think about it this way, but your phone has become your main computer, the device you use the most in your day-to-day life.

With smartphones replacing physical objects in our life, it’s no surprise they’ve replaced plenty of our social interactions as well. We all have a group text with our family or friends going on, where jokes are shared and plans to meet up made. More recently, the smartphone has completely revolutionized dating and meeting people socially. Apps like Tinder and Bumble have gone a long way in removing the social stigma around online dating, creating millions of matches and thousands of relationships. While Tinder, much like early online dating in the 2000s, was originally seen in a negative light, the app’s been around for over half a decade and younger audiences—mainly the millennial market Tinder has aimed for throughout its history—have become relatively comfortable with the concept of meeting people through swipes and apps. In fact, you’d be hard-pressed to find someone in their twenties who didn’t know a couple that met through Tinder.

But if you’re new to Tinder, it might be difficult to learn how the app works. If dating is all communication, how the heck do you even talk to someone in the app? As with any dating app, you’ll have to start by making a match. Let’s see how to send messages on Tinder.

Sending a Message on Tinder

Sending a message in Tinder takes just a second, but you’ll need to have been matched with someone first.

  1. Open Tinder on your device.
  2. Select the speech bubble in the top right.
  3. Select a match from the list.
  4. Select Message in the bottom left to open the message window.
  5. Type your message and hit Send when you’re done.

Tinder’s message system works exactly the same as most messaging apps, with a text entry field and support for emojis and other special characters. Once you send your message, the other person will receive a notification, just like if they were using iMessage, WhatsApp or Facebook Messenger. From there, they can reply when they’re active and online.

What to say in a message on Tinder

Even the most self-confident people fall down when thinking about what to say in an opening message to someone on Tinder. We may be able to talk to the opposite sex naturally and smoothly at any other time but when we are interested in them it just doesn’t work.

Here are a few tips for getting your message across.

  • Avoid saying just ‘Hi’ or ‘How are you’ at all costs. It will fail.
  • Read the person’s profile and get a feel for the person. Reference something in your opening line. If you can be funny, do it. If you’re not naturally funny, don’t.
  • If you have common traits or interests, reference that in your message on Tinder.
  • Try to provoke an emotion, happiness, surprise, excitement, curiosity or whatever. Emotion gets you matches every time. Just try to keep them positive emotions. Some people can get away with a light insult but not many!
  • Avoid talking about looks or body unless it is unique or interesting, the body or your comment.
  • Ask genuine questions that show an interest in the person behind the profile. The more intelligent or unique the question, the higher your chances of success.
  • Check your spelling and grammar before sending. While you don’t get points for correct English, you will lose points if you get it wrong.
  • Avoid txt spk when you send a message on Tinder.
  • Above all else, don’t be creepy.

The best thing you can to when you send a message on Tinder is to tailor your message to the audience. Reading a profile and looking at the images only takes 30 seconds which isn’t a huge investment in a potential date. Coming up with something funny, intelligent, challenging or whatever takes a little longer. But again, how much of your time is a potential date worth?

The more effort you put into Tinder the more you get out of it. Even if you’re not successful the first few times you will soon get a feel for what works and what doesn’t. And above all else, remember that online dating is supposed to be fun for both you and your match. Keep things light, positive, and respectful, and you’ll have a date in no time.

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